Nimicuri

Cu toate că păşim atât de des fără să privim în urmă şi ne stă în fire să uităm dacă nu ne-aducem aminte, că ne retragem în interiorul claustral al sufletelor reci ale noastre sau ale altor oameni la fel de singuri ca noi, deşi in orişicare seară adorm în braţele unui străin şi amandoi dăm sărutul de "buna dimineaţa" unui om pe care nu-l cunoaştem, dar de care avem atâta nevoie pentru a ne menţine sanitatea şi deşi inventăm atâtea minciuni pentru a menţine echilibrul în micile universuri create ce ne dau iluzia de siguranţă, nu am să mint: în mine se mai vorbeşte şi azi despre noi. Deşi nu voi şti nicicând cum e sa fiu iubită de tine iar, cu toate ca nu voi avea dimineţi în care să-mi fie dor de tine, nici nopţi în care să mă cufund în aroma ta, nici sărutari pe frunte. Chiar daca nu vei fi tu cel ce mă va ţine în braţe când îmi va fi frică şi deşi vei fi tu cel la care mă voi gândi când voi spune "iubitule" altcuiva, acelei persoane mediatoare care ...

Vladimir is my imaginary friend and he's schizophrenic. I guess he simply embodies the dark side of me and our demons play well together I can't complain. He's smart and he's a collector of all the things I think I need. I don't. But he knows me better because he's my shadow. Things are never complicated with Vladimir, he knows my mind. He is the product of it but never complains. We've been fighting lately and he tried to escape, never happened before. He likes captivity but he said he's in love. I asked of who, he pointed at me. I said no, it cannot be. So he stared at me with a burning fire in his eyes yet his heart was cold as ice. He asked me: Love, how do you want to die? I glanced away as time passed by and simply wiped him of my mind. I do miss him sometimes, but we're all monsters in the end. Ain't that right?

So it’s May again, time never seems to forgive and hiding gets us tired once we come to an age. Life pulled us back each time we crossed the boundaries and gave us a deadline every time we've drawn in lust. We used to say “you have to be over 18 to live like you’ll die.” What a lie! Remember how hard we tried to keep it real? Working day and night to build some dreams, we thought ”You have to be rich to be mad ” That is just sad! Did we won anything when we lost it all? Our fragile world crushed before our eyes and divided without being aware in me and you. It’s May again and time doesn’t seem to forgive it, if it’s not much trouble to ask, come visit! 

I followed you barefooted without questioning it down by the narrow road paved with promises, I was the insignificant other but matter somehow when each day you went running and begged for me each night, I listened and cured every sorrow you had By drawing them carefully in the palm of my hand, I walked in the bad company of my demons a long road, leaving no broken hearts, not even a  lit cigarette, not being slowed. I hated you sometimes for walking too fast and leaving me behind But never wiped you off my skin, out of my mind.

It's always a matter of opinion the color of my lover's eyes. Either they're blue or green they always seem to blow my mind, in them I find the endless seas under the august sky, the green grass and the memories lost in the back yard where we lie from the beginning of the spring until the end of summer. A peaceful me is who i see in the eyes of my lover.

Ţi-au văzut ochii atâtea clişee, Mâinile ţi-au desluşit mii de mistere, Paşii-mi te-au explorat zi de zi necontenit Prin tine am crescut ca om, tu m-ai călit. Şi-am înşirat pe-o coală atâtea vise Am construit împreună atâtea iluzii, amintiri, Câte-am trăit şi cât amar şi chin, E groaznic cum azi atârn de-un fir. Sunt eu de vina că m-am inalţat spre idealuri, Că n-am rămas să mai convieţuim, Dar continui să-ţi iubesc duritatea şi forfota, Ori liniştea şi tot ce-ai vechi şi nou, Eşti preferatul meu fără-ndoială Şi am să mă-ntorc la tine mereu, Dar şi azi mă îndrept spre necunoscut Cu un bagaj de vise şi-un sărut, Mă-ndrept spre o alta lume în tandem Şi te las în urmă, mai mereu, SM.

I haven’t been so high on this thing you call love since he cut the cords and let me fall. I’m not saying I’m over yet, I’m not saying I do, but damn I can sleep safe in the same bed next to you. It's easier to wake up too and I can find a way to keep myself together and come home day by day. I know is not perfect yet but is going to be I love the way your whole body trusts me! No promises, our story is told by the night chasing the daylight your lips sure make me lose my mind and I'll give in when time is right. I lust to be your lover and I’m going to be as long as you keep me wild you’re the only one who makes my feet stand on the ground, always fight against me, never let me win! I’m my worst enemy. Is going to be hard and take some time until you’ll see the real me. I’m hard to handle, hard to love, I wasn’t meant to be a quiter, you can’t apply me any laws, I’m still a book unwritten. Until today I’ve hit rock bottom and lost it all to bei...